Why it's so important to remove toxic people from your life
What exactly is a toxic person? According to the Urban Dictionary:
“Basically an individual (or individuals) who has a very negative and self-entitlement disorder outlook in life. They are never happy and always want more and more…You can literally die from these people, they will lead you astray.”
Let me help navigate you how to remove toxic people from your life and also what to do with the toxic people that you can't avoid such as a family member or a coworker.
I definitely have had my fair share of toxic people in my life. Looking back in hindsight I understand why I had to let those people go. Some relationships can be hard to let go such as a friendship of 20+ years, or maybe even a long time best friend. Trust me I know because I’ve been there. I also know that we outgrow people and not everyone is meant to travel your entire journey with you. When you remove toxic people from your life you make room for the beautiful new souls who are ready to enter.
Toxic people will literally rob you of your enthusiasm. They spend their time constantly complaining or sitting in a “why is this happening to me” state of mind. In the time they spend complaining they could be reading a book, meditating, exercising, or doing anything that helps them become a better them. That’s why it is so important to get rid of these “energy suckers” as I like to call them, in your life.
When you grow as a person your soul begins to vibrate higher, when you begin to vibrate higher you will start to notice things that maybe you didn’t before in the friends you keep.
For example I use to have this friend, let’s call her Jessica. Well Jessica and I had been friends for about 10 years, and I have spent the past few years of my life doing a lot of soul searching and upgrading my vibration and energy to a whole new level. A little over a year ago every time I spoke to Jessica I realized all she did was constantly gossip about people, even the ones she considered to be close friends. I thought to myself one day “I wonder what she says about me when I’m not around”. This went on for a few months and every time I talked to Jessica I felt drained. Jessica called me one day and asked if I just saw that one of our close friends got engaged, I said “yes and what a beautiful proposal and that ring is stunning” well Jessica was not impressed and went to talk about how the ring was ugly and the proposal was too much. I asked her why she could never be happy for anybody else. It was right then and there I realized this is someone who I really don’t want to be around. Jessica was sucking the life out of me and in reality she knew that ring was gorgeous but she was projecting her own insecurities because that proposal and that ring was something she truly wanted in life but probably didn’t think she was worthy or deserving of it. Whatever Jessica was fighting on the inside reflected her outside world, that’s why she was always complaining or being negative or projecting her own insecurities onto others. I broke up with Jessica and our friendship not long after this, I realized she is not someone I want in my life or to be around.
I had upgraded so much that my vibration no longer matched hers, and that is what will happen to you and some people who are in your life. You’re not meant to take everyone with you on your journey. Some people are just supposed to be there for a certain time period. You will outgrow people in your life, that doesn’t mean that they weren’t supposed to be there. It just means their purpose or the reason has been served and it’s time to move on.
A few years ago before 2018 ended I was going through what I like to call my butterfly stage in life. I was transitioning from a caterpillar to a butterfly, and before the end of the year I had removed four very close people to me from my life. Actually the Universe moved them for me and this all had happened within the last two months of the year and all four of those people had played major roles in my life, but I couldn’t take them with me and they all had served their purpose in my life but they no longer fit who I was becoming. As I walked into 2019 I was on a mission to become the best version of me, and anyone who didn’t align with me, I knew would fall away. I could no longer do negative or toxic people in my life, and I didn’t care if that meant only being friends with my dogs.
When you remove things or people that are toxic and no longer fit who you are becoming you create space for the new. At the time I actually didn’t know what was taking place because like I said before the Universe had removed them, but what was happening was space was being cleared for the new. The new can never come in until the space is cleared. I like to think of it as a plane trying to land on the landing strip, the plane cannot land safely unless the path is cleared.
In February of 2019 I had just enrolled into my Soul Mastery Certification with Amanda Marit. I had no idea the journey I was about to embark on, not to mention the beautiful souls that were about to enter my life. On this journey I met 14 other girls who became my soul sisters. We had spent the next six months together laughing, crying, and upgrading ourselves. I had no idea at the time the huge role these girls would play in my life. I finally found people who understood me and spoke my language. Obviously my relationship with all fourteen girls is different, some bonds are stronger than others, but I love all of these incredible women and coaches.
I had to remove the toxic people from my life, and just because you’ve been friends with someone since grade school or have gone through the most awkward stages of your life with them does not mean they are meant to travel the entire journey with you.
You could meet someone tomorrow who understands you more and has better intentions for you than someone you’ve known your whole life.
Take a look around at the people you have in your life, do they make you feel excited and happy to be around, or do they make you feel drained and exhausted for being friends with them. If they make you feel drained cut them out.
Everything is energy, and whenever we are around people we are exchanging our energies. People who are negative or toxic are what I like to call "energy vampires". Have you ever hung out with someone for the day and when you left and went home you just felt absolutely exhausted? I'm sure you have, there are so many different types of energy vampires so let me explain a few.
THE COMPLAINER
All the complainer does is complain. It doesn't matter what it is they will find something wrong in everything. These people never look at the bright side of things and actually look for things to complain about. These people are draining and will suck the life out of you.
You deserve to have people in your life who support your accomplishment's, who make you feel good after spending time or just chatting on the phone. Friends are suppose to be our cheerleaders not our energy suckers. Take a look around at the people you allow into your life. Pay attention to the "friends" who are not excited to celebrate you when you accomplished something major in your life.